Monday, 28 May 2012

Cross Country

Here is Bella's first draft about the cross country.  She is proud of how she has described how she felt about it.  Leave a comment and let Bella know what you think.


  1. Wonderful writing Bella. I enjoyed reading your story and the great similes you used helped me to imgaine just what it was like for you.

    1. Bella's Mum28 May 2012 at 20:43

      Wow Bella, what a fantastic descriptive story! You really shared how you felt before, during and after your race. I can tell it is your first draft because there are a lot of spelling mistakes! How will you find out the correct spelling of words you are unsure of?

  2. Your story was magnificent. I get a grate piture in my head.

  3. Great descriptive writing Bella, you made the reader feel that they were almost running the race too.

  4. Wow Bella! This is a fantastic descriptive piece of writing! I felt as if I was at the race with you. You use similes really well throughout the writing. I can't wait to read it when you have finished all your checking! Well done! Aunty Ginny x

  5. Cool story Bella this is sooooooo awesome by see you at school =]